Friday, September 22, 2006

Collingwood

A Collingwood girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter.
"I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says.
"Come again?" says the worker, cupping his ear.
"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise."
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Another Collingwood girl was involved in a serious crash, there's blood everywhere.
The paramedics arrive and drag the girl out of the car till she's lying flat out on the road.
Medic: "OK, I'm going to check if you're concussed."
Sharon: "Ok."
Medic: "How many fingers am I putting up?"
Sharon: "Oh my god I'm paralysed from the waist down!"
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A Collingwood girl goes to Centrelink to register for child benefit.
"How many children?" asks the assessor.
"Ten" replies the Collingwood girl,
"Ten?"says the Centrelink worker.
"What are their names?"
"Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan and Nathan"
"Doesn't that get confusing?"
"Naah..." says the Collingwood girl.
"Its great because if they are out playing in the street I just have shout NATHAN, YER DINNER'S READY or NATHAN GO TO BED NOW and they all do it..."
"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed Centrelink worker.
"That's easy," says the Collingwood girl... "I just use their surnames"
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A Collingwood Girl enters a sex shop & asks for a vibrator.
The man says: "Choose one from our range on the wall."
She says "I'll take the red one."
The man replies: "That's a fire extinguisher."
Some of WC's finest (by the way he is a Collingwood supporter)

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